


First Dates, Featuring Overprotective Siblings

by sithgem



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Brother-Sister Relationships, Dirty Jokes, First Dates, Flirting, Fluff, Holding Hands, Ice Cream, Multi, Overprotective, Panic Attacks, Pastries, Texting, connor wants to make sure his sis is okay even if it's unreasonable essentially, evan does Not wanna be here, there's like one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-06-09
Packaged: 2018-10-30 02:28:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10867119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sithgem/pseuds/sithgem
Summary: Alana and Zoe want their first date to be perfect. Connor wants to make sure Zoe's safe. Evan just wants this nightmare to be over already.





	1. Why Are You Asking Me To Do This?

Evan was minding his own business at home that fateful Friday night. He just wanted to watch his nature documentaries in peace. He didn't ask for this. He wasn't expecting Connor to be texting him at 8 o' clock at night, and quite frankly, he wasn't expecting him to text him ever. He thought that when Connor offered him his number two days prior, it was just a joke. But here he was. Sitting on his couch and eyeing his phone screen cautiously.

 **Connor:** evan

 **Connor:** evan are u there

 

Evan gulped. His hands were shaking already and he didn't know why. Jesus, why was he so _awkward?_   He wasn't even talking to Connor in person! This was ridiculous!

Tentatively, Evan texted back.

 

 **Evan:** Connor? What's up?

 **Connor:** evan it's an emergency

 **Evan:** !!! What?! What's wrong?!

 **Connor:** its zoe

 **Evan:** Oh my god. Is she sick??? Is she in the hospital?????????

 **Connor:** not yet she isnt

 **Evan:** What do you mean???

 **Connor:** she's on her date with alana rn

 **Connor:** im in my car. goin over to make sure she's safe

 

Evan stared at his screen for a solid minute. His hands were trembling from the thought of Zoe or Connor getting hurt. He paused, sighing, then started texting again:

 

 **Evan:** Connor.

 **Connor:** wha

 **Evan:** Connor Alexa Murphy.

 **Connor:** wha

 **Evan:** Why

 **Evan:** do you need me to spy on your sister for you?

 **Evan:** Scratch that. Why are you spying on Zoe in the first place???? She's 17??? She can handle herself???

 **Connor:** u dont understand

 **Connor:** last boyfriend she had broke her heart so badly she didnt even /try/ to make a witty comment when i made fun of her for it

 **Connor:** she was crushed evan and i'll be damned if im gonna let alana do the same

 **Evan:** Connor, Alana is one of the sweetest girls I know. There's no way she'd break Zoe's heart.

 **Connor:** u say that but i cant risk it.

 **Connor:** what if zoe gets pregnant

 **Evan:** Connor, to the best of my knowledge, Alana doesn't have a penis. How would that even happen?

 **Connor:** they could go to a sperm bank

 **Evan:** Yeah, cause that's my idea for the perfect first date. Go to the f-ing sperm bank.

 **Connor:** thats cute

 

Evan started getting sweaty again.

 

 **Evan:** wait what

 

Connor didn't start typing until a minute or so later.

 

 **Connor:** i mean

 **Connor:** you dont swear in texts. thats fuckin adorable

 **Conno** r: in all honesty

 **Connor:** that was weird im sorry

 

Evan made an audible squeaking noise.

 

 **Evan:** It's not! But thats

 **Evan:** That's besides the point

 

Connor responded immediately. 

 

 **Connor:** Wright

 **Connor:** *right

 **Connor:** autocorrect sorry

 **Evan:** It's fine.

 **Connor:** anyway im outside the restaraunt they're at rn

 **Connor:** cant see anything yet

 **Evan:** Connor, you can't see anything yet because nothing's gonna happen.

 **Evan:** Just give them some space. And leave me out of this!

 **Connor:** but she wont suspect that i got you to watch them

 **Connor:** zoe sees me she'll just get mad and storm off

 **Connor:** she sees you

 **Connor:** she might ask but u wont be suspect

 **Connor:** so i need u

 

Evan took a deep breath.

 

 **Evan:** Connor,

 **Connor:** ye

 **Evan:** Connor, I really. Don't want to get involved in this

 **Connor:** evan please this is my sister

 **Connor:** i dont wanna see her get hurt

 **Connor:** please

 

Evan felt a pit grow in his chest. He wasn't gonna put up with this. _Connor freakin' Murphy_ texts him out of the blue after shoving him into a locker two weeks prior and asks him to spy on his sister. Yeah, right. This was a joke. This had to be a joke. It was so outlandish and vaguely creepy that it couldn't be real. He was gonna decline it and delete his number and move on. He was an idiot for thinking they'd be friends anyways after he got his number. He just wanted to use him. That's all anyone ever wanted him for anyways. Why did he think this'd be any different?!

And yet, here Evan was. Staring at his phone screen and weighing his options. He knew he shouldn't do it. But what would happen if he didn't? Would Connor beat him up? Would he make something up about him and blackmail him? Would he tell Zoe everything and make him look like a stalker? What if he started rumors? What if Zoe found him out and he said that Evan'd set him up? What if-

 

 **Evan:** Fine. What restaraunt are they at?

 **Connor:** not really a restaurant. more like a pastry shop at the edge of town. it's like

 **Connor:** idk a ten minute drive? from my place at least

 **Connor:** idk where u live so

 **Evan:** I can't drive.

 **Connor:** damn

 **Connor:** wait there. i'll pick u up then

 **Connor:** not really a point in walking

 

Evan took a deep breath.

 

 **Evan:** Sounds good to me

 **Connor:** nice

 **Connor:** see ya then nerd

 **Evan:** See ya I guess

 

Evan shut off his phone and changed the channel on the TV. He then grabbed one of the couch cushions and screamed into it. 


	2. Zoe's Intuition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and here we get into the date. i just wanted to make something cute n fluffy for these two. i love them so,,

Zoe felt sick for two hours before Alana showed up. Her family kept checking in on her, asking if she was ready to go or if she still wanted to go through with it. Even before that night, Larry'd asked if she would "maybe find a nice boy to settle down with instead since Alana was your best friend for so long." _Thank_ you Larry Murphy, or, as he called himself when Zoe and her brother came out to him, "the least homophobic man on the planet even if I don't support your life choices." Least he didn't kick her out. That was a plus, she guessed.

To make matters worse, Connor kept peeking through the window blinds in the living room to the street to see if Alana was pulling up. Zoe groaned, not even bothering to talk to him. Connor had been _way_ too overbearing since her ex dumped her. He was always hovering when Alana came over to hang out, even before they started... Dating? Were they dating now? Zoe wasn't... Totally sure. They both said they wanted to go out for a date but. If it didn't work out, they wouldn't be dating. Was it too soon to call it that? Zoe didn't know.

Either way, Connor was being a pain in the ass the whole week. She figured he knew she had a crush on Alana for the longest time. Zoe didn't make it too obvious, she thought, but if there was one thing she knew about her brother was that if there was anyone in the world you could learn things about repressed gay crushes, it was Connor Murphy.

Zoe looked at herself in the mirror, fixing her eyeliner. She was wearing a red cardigan over a black tank top and black leggings. She wasn't planning on going anywhere fancy that night. Probably just the old bakery by the edge of town or the park. She'd done up her hair in a pony-tail, which was about as formal as Zoe Murphy could get, and done her makeup a little neater than usual. She stopped and looked herself over, butterflies in her stomach. She felt like she was gonna throw up, but in the good kind of way. _Is that even a thing? That's not a thing._

After an eternity and at the same time all too soon, Zoe heard the doorbell ring. She quickly grabbed her purse and unplugged her headphones, shoving them and her phone in the bag. She pulled the strap over her shoulder and jogged down the stairs where she was met with the front door. She took a deep breath and opened it.

_Oh. My. God._

Alana was... She was stunning. She was always stunning, but... Wow. She didn't even look much different than normal. She had on this cute pink lipstick and warm-toned eyeshadow, and her hair was pulled back into a poofy bun. She wore a white sundress with floral patterns all over the skirt and a green cardigan. She'd changed her glasses, too, to a green pair with two little rhinestones about the left lense. She'd put on stud earings and a white, pearly necklace. 

Holy _shit_ , Zoe was gay.

So gay, in fact, that she couldn't even say anything when she first opened the door. Alana gave a little wave, then looked around behind her a bit. Her tiny smile melted into a concerned frown.

"You okay, Zoe?" She asked. Zoe snapped herself out of it, stammering.

"Uh, yeah, um. Sorry, I just - You... You look beautiful," she sighed. Alana's eyes widened and she covered her face with her hands, whimpering. Zoe's face went bright red. How the fuck was she this cute?!

"Ahhh! You look cute, too, Zoe!" Alana beamed. Zoe's knees went weak. She was gonna die. Alana Beck was gonna fucking kill her.

Zoe cleared her throat, "Uh. Thanks." She rubbed her arm, nervously. "I'm sorry, it's just - I don't know. I don't usually get flustered easily but... Whoa."

Alana laughed. Zoe could listen to laugh for an eternity.

"Well," she began, "I'm glad I can make you flustered then. I think."

Now it was Zoe's turn to laugh.

"You're so cute, Lonnie," she said. She froze immediately after those words left her mouth. Alana stuttered a bit.

"O-oh," she whispered. "Thank you... Um. I can't think of any cute nicknames for 'Zoe.' Sorry."

"It's fine! It's fine... What about... Blow-ey?"

Alana snorted, trying as hard as she could not to laugh. Zoe realized what she'd just said and it hit her like a freight train.

"Wait - Shit, that wasn't - " Zoe cracked a smile. "Oh, don't laugh at me! I couldn't think of anything!"

"Sure thing, Blow-ey Moterboat."

Alana had to lean on the door-frame to keep herself from keening over with laughter. Zoe followed her soon after. It wasn't even that funny, but Alana's laugh was so infectious. _God_ , that was cute.

When they'd calmed down, Zoe giggled one last time before fixing her bangs a bit.

"We should probably head out," she said. Alana smiled, nodding, and held out her hand. Zoe chuckled and took her hand, interlocking their fingers. She could feel the tips of her ears burning up. 

The two got into Alana's car, and she turned on the ignition.

"Where're we going?" She asked. Zoe opened her mouth to speak, but closed it when she looked through the window. For a split second, she saw someone peeking through the curtains of her house to watch them. She muttered a curse under her breath. Alana looked over. "What happened?"

"Nothing," Zoe replied, trying to keep her cool. "I think I know where to go. It's a little bakery a little ways up. Just hang a left when we get into town and keep straight."

"Think that's gonna be hard for the both of us."

That earned a laugh from the two of them, and they head off.

Zoe knew Connor was gonna be watching them. And as much as she loathed it, she wanted to have some fun. She smirked, pulling out her phone and snapped a picture of Alana while she drove and sent it to Connor via text. The image came with the caption:

 

_"On our way to the bakery. Only sweet treat I wanna eat is right here tho ~"_

 

She added a smiley emoji with the tongue sticking out and snickered to herself when she saw the bakery come into view.


	3. Enter Connor Murphy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so the escapades begin

Evan was curled up on the couch on the brink of having a panic attack when he heard Connor ring the doorbell to his house. He couldn't believe he'd given Connor Murphy his address. He was still angry, at least a little, but also freaking the hell out and trying not to cry. So a pretty normal Friday night, other than the fact that the guy who was the literal embodiment of what Evan perceived as fear was standing right outside his house. Well, not entirely fear. Maybe also some teenage angst and anger. Not to say that everything about Connor was bad either; Evan didn't know that. And, like, what if Connor was a really nice person deep down like in one of those sappy teen romance movies? Was Evan in a sappy teen romance movie? Wait, who would he even be if Connor was the angsty love interest? _Wait, this is so creepy. Why am I even thinking -_

Connor rang the doorbell again. Evan lept up to his feet. He fixed his shirt, not really knowing why, and opened the door. Connor stood on the other side, hair disheveled a bit from the wind and wearing what Jared had once called "The Official Connor Murphy Hoodie™." He sported some ripped up jeans, of which the knee-holes were far too wide and made him look a little bit ridiculous. But like Evan was going to say that to his face. Connor had on a pair of sunglasses, too, and worn out converse. He looked up at Evan and gave him a two-fingered salute before straightening up with a smirk.

"Sup, Hansen," he said. Evan gave a tiny wave back, almost saying something but deciding (wisely) against it. Connor chuckled lightly and turned around. "C'mon Hansen. Don't have a lot of time."

"What do you want me to do again?" Evan asked, trailing behind him. "Like. Specifically. I-I don't think you mentioned it."

Connor opened the door to the driver's seat of the car, sliding in. "I was gonna just have you sit in the car with me and watch." He cleared his throat. "But I thought - You know, 'why would Evan agree to just sitting in the back seat of my dad's Prius,' so I thought of a better strategy."

"Which is?"

Connor turned to Evan as he put on his seat belt. Weird. Evan didn't think Connor'd put on a seat belt. It didn't seem like something an emotional teenage hipster/emo hybrid kid would do. He always saw in movies that the badass, "no-f's-given" kinda guys didn't wear seat belts and smoked cigarettes and owned motorcycles. Wait, was that not a thing anymore?

"I'm having you go in," Connor said, "and see what they're up to from the inside."

Evan's eyes widened.

"Wait - what?" He asked. Connor rolled his eyes.

"I'm asking you to go inside the pastry shop or whatever and watch them. It's not rocket science, Hansen."

Evan slumped himself into the passenger seat, "I still don't think this is right." Connor watched him and released a bit of the tension in his shoulder, leaning over the wheel. 

"Look, I know that I sound paranoid. Believe me, I've been told that _multiple_ times." Connor's tone teetered on a hiss on "multiple." "But I just wanna be there for Zoe, okay? She's my little sister. Isn't that, like, what brothers are supposed to do or whatever?"

"Don't look at me," Evan muttered. "I'm an only child."

"Figured." Connor turned the keys in the ignition. There was a quiet pause, and the car started. "Did I - Did I cross a line, or-?"

"No!" Evan said, much louder than he wanted to. "No, no. You're good." Connor shrugged and pulled the car out of the driveway. 

They drove in silence, pretty much. Uncomfortable, nerve-wracking silence. Connor kept his eyes glued to the road, which Evan knew was a good thing, but he felt at any moment he'd turn around and snap his neck or something. He started fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, looking out the passenger side window to distract him. What the hell had he gotten himself into?

"You okay?" Evan practically lept out of his seat. He turned to Connor who's eyes were flickering between him and the up-coming right turn around the block. "You look like you're about to throw up." Evan was about to say he was fine, but after Connor mentioned it, he started feeling sick. Fantastic.

"U-uh, I just..." Evan didn't know what to say. He didn't know why he opened his mouth in the first place. And yet here he was, no doubtedly sweating in embarrassing places and on the verge of vomitting and for what? Why was he getting so worked up about this? He knew exactly why, who was he kidding? Because he was sitting next to Connor Murphy about to do the dumbest thing in his life which was made even worse by the fact that it was _Connor Murphy_   who'd talked him into this, and why was he even listening to him? So what if he teased him and ruined his life and made sure everyone at school knew he was a piece of shit like he knew he was or pointed out flaws Evan somehow didn't notice and-

"Dude, calm the hell down," Connor interrupted his thoughts. "You're not gonna get in trouble for this."

"Wh-what the hell do you even mean?!" Evan nearly yelled. "Y-You're sending m-me on this-"

"Evan, if Zoe brings it up, which she won't most likely, literally just pin the blame on me," Connor said, parking the car and staring at him. "I honestly do not care if she thinks I set you up. Besides, I don't want you getting the short end of the stick for something that _I_ had you do."

Evan blinked. A tiny bit of that nervous energy had dissipated, but far too much was still there. Connor sighed, shutting his eyes for a second, then restarted the car, getting back on the street. 

A minute or so passed in silence, but not the uneasy silence they'd just gotten out of. A bit of the tension was eased, and like hell if Evan wasn't at least somewhat relieved. Connor muttered something as they drove into a tiny shop's parking lot. It was pink and cutesy and everything that wasn't Connor. For a split second, Evan wondered why they were there before remembering what Connor had said earlier. How could he forget that? That was literally what they were there for. _God, I'm such an **idiot**._

When Connor's words met Evan's ears, he snapped out of it a bit. He turned to him to see his hands gripping the steering wheel much more laxly and head leaning back against his seat.

"I'm sorry, um, could you say that again?" Despite it being the least rude sounding question in the world, Evan still felt that sting of guilt for phrasing it that way. Was there even a polite way to ask someone to repeat themselves? Evan didn't know one. He was such a nuisance.

"I said," Connor mummbled, a bit louder this time, "thanks for, uh. You know. Agreeing. To. This. I guess." Evan took a deep breath.

"N-no problem." He cursed himself for stuttering. Connor looked over to him.

"I mean it," he said. He reached over and unlocked the car doors. "We're here, by the way. I already saw Alana's car, so I know they're here. Just act casual, Hansen." Evan nodded. Casual... He could do casual. Casual was his middle name. He was ready for this.

The second he got out of the car, Evan tripped onto the pavement. 

Connor made a throaty, stifled sound that was almost a laugh. But Evan wasn't going to bring up that he heard Connor laugh. No, sir. He wasn't gonna risk that. He turned around a gave Connor a thumbs up before wiping his pants down. Connor smirked and shut the door behind him. Evan took another deep breath, and walked into the bakery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was so tempted to title this chapter connor makes an entrace but i have fuckin restraint. also it's gonna get gayer for connor and evan don't worry about it


	4. Tight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end of this chapter has mentions of a panic attack that goes on to the end so if that bugs you stop reading the chapter/skip at the line "This was terrible."

Zoe had everything planned out. Her and Alana were going to the pastry shop, then they'd sit down and chat and be all flirty, then she'd have them drive out to the park just as the sun was setting, woo Alana just right, and then kiss her. It was the perfect strategy. She was ready. She was going to sweep Alana off her feet and make her feel like the most important girl in the world. Zoe took a deep breath, took a swig from a warm water bottle from the cupholder that was sitting in that car for god knows how long, and gave herself the gayest pep talk of her life.

 _You got this, Murphy,_ she thought. _She's gonna love this. You're the girl. You're gonna_ rock  _this bitch._

"What'd you say, Zoe?"

Zoe almost choked on her water. She said that out loud, didn't she? Zoe started sputtering, clearing her throat and trying not to die before she made her move. She did that thing she always saw confident bad boys do in old movies and blew a strand of hair out of her face, leaning back against the chair. She knew she looked stupid cause Alana's looking at her, trying not to laugh. She smirked.

"Nothin', Lonnie." It was a little weird calling your former best friend and potential girlfriend a pet name. Zoe didn't really... _Do_ nicknames. Just in general. That was more Connor's area of expertise. He gave nicknames to strangers a lot of the time. It was kinda weird actually.

But Zoe had to stay focused. She had to say something endearing. Something sweet to Alana to make up for that blunder. 

"Just lost in how cute you look today," she continued. "And every day." Alana blinked a few times, flustered, then smiled bashfully.

" _Dawwww_... You sap," she playfully shoved Zoe's shoulder with her own. Zoe laughed, sitting back up and looking out the window. 

"We're here," she said. Alana looked over and saw the bright, pastel building with a giant macaroon on a sign on the roof. This place looked cute! She smiled again, and pulled the car into the parking lot, getting out first and gracefully offering her hand to Zoe's on the other side. Zoe snickered and took it, and then they were both standing outside the bakery in the parking lot. Holding hands. They were holding hands. Zoe's heart skipped a beat because _holy shit I'm holding hands with Alana Beck, my favorite person in the entire world, I'm gonna die._ Alana fixed her glasses and led Miss Zoe "almost tripped over her own goddamn feet because she couldn't stop thinking about how soft Alana's hands were and being fucking gay" Murphy through the door.

Now, Zoe had expected the person behind the counter of the bakery shop to be someone tiny, preppy, and cute. Maybe a little blonde girl with pink nail polish that was very. _very_ badly applied to her fingernails, or a really desperate teenager covered in acne from toe to tip in a pastel, flower-printed apron. Maybe even a bookish looking brunette who does the math of the order in her head and doesn't even type anything into the cash register to find your total. You know, one of those people.

She didn't expect Jared Kleinman.

"Kleinman?!" Zoe exclaimed. Jared didn't seem in a hurry to turn to look at her, but when their eyes met, he leaned back. "The hell are you doing here?!"

"Uh, I work here?" He fixed his posture and scrunched up his nose. "The hell are _you_ doing here?" 

"Well, um -"

"No, no. Don't tell me." He craned his neck to see behind her. "Hey, Alana."

"Hi, Jared," she said.

"You're on a date with her, aren't you?" Jared asked.

"What? No! Why would you -"

"You're holding hands, and I'm guessing you came in the same car here," Jared continued. "Trust me, Zo, I know my people when I see them."

"Whatever. Yeah, I'm on a... date with Alana," Zoe said. "And I... didn't expect you to be here."

"Feeling's mutual. I'm supposed to be off. Boss called me at, like, four in the afternoon and said I had to come in for work today. Just my luck, ya know?"

"Um, so, do I - we order... To you? Or...?" Alana chimed in. Jared shrugged.

"Guess so," he said. "Nobody else's working the register, so."

Zoe and Alana moved up closer to Jared so Alana could see the menu printed up on a wall behind him. The bakery wasn't too crowded. Just a family of four sitting in the far back. Nothing crazy. It was perfect. If not for the fact that Jared Kleinman was going to be watching them. Great. Peachy. Didn't put a dent in Zoe's confidence, no sir.

Alana ended up getting a cup of soft-serve ice cream (Zoe recommended it to her. This place sold the best ice cream she'd ever had. Even better than _À la Mode_ , but since her parents thought differently, she rarely got any here). And Zoe ordered some cream puffs. Creap puffs here were so good. Everything in the bakery was amazing from what Zoe'd remembered. She'd hoped Alana felt the same.

It was nice, just sitting with her for a bit, chatting, nervously flirting with each other, eating their treats. Then, there was silence. Alana's spoon clicked against the edge of her cup.

"... Zoe?"

"Hm? What's up?"

"... Why did you try to tell Jared we weren't dating?"

Zoe stopped eating and looked up. Alana was staring at the table, drawing little patterns into it with her free hand. She looked... A little sad. Zoe's heart hurt when she noticed.

"Lonnie, I," she tried to think of the words, "I didn't know if you were comfortable - you know, with letting people know. About. Us."

"Well, um, I _am_ comfortable," Alana continued, turning to Zoe. "B-But if you're not, that's understandable! Completely! I respect-"

"No, no! It's fine with me, too. I just, um, got worried? I don't know." Zoe's head slumped into her hands. "Ughhh. I'm sorry that I'm. You know. Fucking this up?" Alana bolted upright to hold Zoe's wrist. 

"Zoe, it's okay. I'm just paranoid is all," she said, released her grip. She took a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. Zoe looked back up and sighed.

"Let's... Talk about something else. How's yearbook doing?"

"Oh! Great, actually! Matthew Colbalt - you know him, the freshman? - he gave up some money so we could _finally_ afford - " Alana cut herself off. Zoe was staring at the door to the bakery, behind her. She didn't look too happy. Oh god, was it something Alana said? Did she do something? Did Matthew do something and bringing it up made her panic? Oh gosh, that'd be terrible! Alana was about to apologize before Zoe looked back at her.

"What the hell is this? A high school reunion?" She asked. Alana narrowed her eyes, confused. Zoe quickly pointed at the dirrection she was looking in before taking a bite of a cream puff. Alana twisted so she could see. She let out a tiny gasp. Zoe pulled her back around, not hard enough to hurt her, but enough to get the message across.

"Don't stare. He'll know we're looking," she whispered.

"What? Why don't we want that?" Alana asked.

"Cause it would be pretty fucking awkward to have to talk to Evan Hansen on top of Mister Gamergate over there looking at us," Zoe explained. This was terrible. Why couldn't they just be alone? Or surrounded by people who didn't know them and couldn't possibly have any interest in what they were doing? Everything started feeling tighter around her. Zoe grunted, trying to brush it off, but she just felt so claustrophobic and everything was crashing down around her and her plan for the perfect date probably wasn't going to happen and Alana might not want to be with her anymore, or -

"Zoe," Alana's voice was small and quiet. Zoe snapped out of it and looked at her. "Calm down. It's just Evan." She took her hands and held them on top of the table. "You don't have to panic."

 _But I'm still panicking_ , Zoe thought. _And there is no concievable way that this could get make me feel any worse, so please keep holding my hands and don't let go of me so I don't start crying in public because I hate when I do that...Why am I like this?_


End file.
